Well That Was Interesting
I just went out for my lunch break and I was reading my Kindle on a bench outside of the library. All of the students are back on campus and one in particular was on the phone on a bench across the way from me. This is what I heard:
“Hi mom. Yeah, it’s really scary. I mean his down there, you know, his junk is all swollen and red! I mean it’s huge! And he’s not worried about it!” Then, after talking to her for a bit, she hangs up the phone, and apparently the swollen junk guy calls her and this ensues: “Yeah, well I was talking to my mom. What are you going to do about it? Well did she get you an appointment? She should have gotten you an appointment! It’s all red and swollen Tyler, you need to get it checked out! It’s been that way for 2 weeks, it can’t be nothing! That is the fucking stupidest fucking thing I have heard someone say in my whole fucking life. What if it was me? Wouldn’t you want me to get checked out? Tyler, it’s swollen! Especially the right one!”
She went on for a little while and then eventually hung up, saying she couldn’t deal with him anymore. I sat, pretending not to hear her, but snickering under my breath. The following things came to mind:
1) She referred to his penis as his “down there” and I couldn’t help but think of 50 Shades of Crappity Crap and Anastasia Steele’s “down there”.
2) Did she not realize that sound travels and that anyone in the vicinity could clearly hear her?? (There were several people walking by at the time too.)
3) Poor, poor Tyler. He didn’t even know his girlfriend (? I’m hoping that’s what she is) was spouting off about his “junk” in a very public place.
It was entertaining though 🙂 Welcome to life on a college campus!