Do you ever think…

was this how my parents felt when they were my age?

It’s odd, this parenting thing. When you’re a kid you look up to your parents and think they have all the answers. You think they know exactly what they are doing 100% of the time. Then you become a parent, and you think (or at least I do), is this how they felt?  Unsure of some things? The last 8 1/2 years have taught me that most of the time, parenting means making things up as you go. Maybe it’s like that for me because I am the non-bio mom. Maybe it’s because Big D was older when we met. Or maybe that’s just how it is? I often wonder if I’m alone in this feeling…

Another thing I remember thinking as a child was that my parents were so old! Really they were almost 30 when I was born, so they were 48 when I finished high school. Is 48 old? Now that I’m in my thirties, I don’t think so. I don’t feel like a grown up most of the time. I feel young – except when my bones are creaking, or when I get into bed for the night and see it’s only 9:00 p.m. 🙂

I wonder what Big D will think about when he’s a dad? (Hopefully we won’t have to find that out too soon!!) Will he think that we had all the answers? Will he think about how he wants to do it differently? Will he want to do it the same? Will he realize we were just going with the flow?

It’s hard to realize that your parents are no different than you. They don’t have all the answers. When you were little, they just made all that shit up.



About thelesbiannextdoor

I am a 41 year old lesbian, living with her wife in a small town. I have a 23 year old step-son. Who knows, I could be your neighbor ;) (Unless you know for sure your neighbor is not a lesbian - then I'm probably not!)

Posted on August 15, 2012, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. 4 Comments.

  1. I don’t know about you, but as I try all this out for size, I realise that not only did my parents make shit up as they went along, they cocked some things up so massively along the way! But hey, I guess we learn from ours, and others mistakes!

    You never know how you’re going to react until you’re in that situation, and instinct takes over. I’m not too proud to say I don’t get things right and I don’t have a clue as to what I’m doing, but then again, does anyone? 😉

    • I don’t think anyone ever does, dear Giraffe 🙂 My parents definitely “cocked some things up so massively along the way”! I tried to learn from their mistakes, but you can never be too sure that what you’ve done was 100% right.

      Instinct does have a lot to do with it! The question is, where does that instinct come from?

  2. I am unsure of what I’m doing 85% of the time. The other 15% of the time we’re watching TV.

  3. Hahaha! Speaker 7 you crack me up!

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