Searching

I’ve been trying to figure out why I keep on blogging, even though I have absolutely nothing interesting to say. I live a very settled down life. Some may say it’s boring. I say it’s the sweetest thing. Yes, we are lesbians and yes we have a son, but I don’t think that’s really anything that should be so interesting to the outside world.

I’ve been finding myself grasping for topics* to post about. Things about our life you might actually want to read – and I have come up with nothing. I guess I am in the middle of the November blues. I’m not depressed, but I just can’t think of any reason to come on here and type.

I read a blog recently where the blogger wrote that she hates blogs that don’t show you a picture, go on and on about nothing, etc, and I thought, “well, there’s my blog in a nutshell!” It kind of upset me because I think she may not realize that some people do not show their faces or their kids faces because they want to respect their family’s privacy. Am I some big time Hollywood actor or famous person? No. My wife is a very private person. She does not want her picture here. I respect that. I am employed at a job I absolutely love and cannot fathom losing that. Who’s to say someone I know might not stumble upon this place?

I have gone back and forth about showing my picture (in a PW protected post of course), simply because I think I sort of owe it to you for sticking around through all the mundane stuff. Maybe someday I will, but I can’t say if that day will be tomorrow or 10 months from now or never.

One of the things I like about blogging is the anonymity. I can come here and say whatever I want, and you don’t have a clue who I am, so it makes it easy to say what I feel. I don’t feel ashamed or embarrassed because I don’t know you in real life.  I can be freer. I have read blogs where the person writing is holding a lot back because of who reads it. I never wanted that for my blog.

I think the person writing that blog called herself a “blog snob” or something to that effect. After thinking about it for a little while, I have to agree, she is a blog snob. And that sort of stinks because I did enjoy reading her blog before, and now I am not so much inclined to visit there.

I read all different kinds of blogs, some with a lot of anonymity, some with none. I enjoy all of them equally. I will read all about anyone’s life because I find people interesting, not because I can see their faces.(Although I admit I do like to put a face to the blog).

I guess I am just searching right now. I go through stages. We’ll see where this one takes me.

If you show your picture on your blog, did you have any reservations about it? Why did you decide to do it/not do it? Was it a debate, or something you didn’t even think about? If you did it, did you regret it?

Now a weird question – what do you think I look like? Having read my blog for a while, what picture comes to mind?

*I haven’t forgotten about your questions A! I am just in a bit of a slump.

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About thelesbiannextdoor

I am a 40 year old lesbian, living with her wife in a small town. I have a 22 year old step-son. Who knows, I could be your neighbor ;) (Unless you know for sure your neighbor is not a lesbian - then I'm probably not!)

Posted on November 21, 2011, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. 16 Comments.

  1. If you truly “have nothing interesting to say”, then why do I keep reading your blog? A blog doesn’t need to be any certain thing (pictures, exciting stories, etc.) to be interesting to its readers. If you enjoy writing and people keep reading, then I think it makes complete sense to keep writing – even if the “blog snobs” have an issue with your blog.

    As for showing my picture, I started out with a small photo of my eyes/forehead on my blog until I was identified by someone who had recently graduated from my residency program. It was kind of a shock to see how easily my “cover” had been blown, so I removed the photo of myself to make my identity a bit less obvious to anyone who might discover my blog. I try to maintain a level of relative anonymity on my blog given that I work with the public in my job and a lot of medical organizations have issues with doctors who write blogs. I’ve invested far too much into my career to have it jeopardized by my online activities.

    • Hi Solitary Diner! The reasons you state in the second paragraph are similar to the reasons I feel uneasy about it. I work at a college, and a lot of times I blog from here. I don’t take the usual 15 minute breaks during the day, so this is my little outlet to get my mind out of work for a few minutes.

      Thank you for continuing to read here! BTW, I read your blog too!

  2. I’m sorry you now feel that way about my blog. I read every one of your updates, and as I stated in that post, there are exceptions to my snobbiness and I greatly enjoy your posts. I will continue being a faithful reader. Pictures or not, I enjoy your posts!

    • I’m really glad to read this CJ. I have enjoyed following along with your blog as well. I think it made me a bit sensitive to read that because I have struggled with whether or not to post pictures and make this blog less anonymous. I’ve also struggled with rambling on and on with no clear point 😉 Thank you for taking the time to comment – I really do appreciate it!

  3. We share pictures of ourselves in p-word protected posts. We don’t share our written names anywhere. I don’t regret it, although nothing has happened for me to regret 🙂 I think it’s nice to put faces to blogs and so we decided to do so with ours. We still share Curly’s face not p-word protected, but that will have to stop at some point, possibly soon. I don’t want to compromise his safety or anything.

    • As always, thanks for the comment Strawberry!

      I think I may be over-thinking things. Some days I think, what’s the big deal? And others I think do_not_do_it!

      BTW, I’ve been meaning to tell you that I saw your picture in a magazine last week! (I know you said on your blog you’d be in it, but I forgot.)

  4. Cool! Of course, it was teeny tiny picture. lol. But you got the added bonus of our living room and couch. 😉

  5. I LOVE that you keep writing!! You don’t need to share all the intimate details of your life to be an excellent writer (which you are). I enjoy reading all the things you write about and am not ever just reading your blog to look for a “juicy” post. I really enjoy the details that you DO share and am hoping (fingers crossed!!) that you keep on keepin’ on! xoxo

  6. Simply sharing your thoughts is wonderful–the basic curiosities of life can be just as amazing as the deep conversational stuff.

  7. I’m with the others, I’ve enjoyed reading you and I hope you continue. You have a skill for writing which is not something that can be said for some bloggers.

  8. Nothing wrong with having a blog about your life – it is interesting to others even if it seems boring to you! Recently I had an old college friend stay overnight in my home. We put him up in the guest room and made him breakfast the next day and he remarked about how wonderful my life seemed to him. I was shocked – “Oh really? I think my life is very run-of-the-mill and boring!” “It looks pretty amazing from where I sit,” was his reply. I think we all go around devaluing our current situations, even if we are deliriously happy, out of some sense of self-deprecation – who knows why. In any case, keep writing – you’ll look back on your posts years from now and be glad you did. And you’ll give strangers on the internet something to read!

    As for the photos, I used to post pictures of myself with nary a thought, but wouldn’t dream of doing so now. Someone at work found my blog (I’ve no idea how, and he won’t tell me) and I just don’t feel comfortable doing it anymore. If I didn’t think I’d lose more than half my reader types, I’d probably move the whole thing somewhere else to anonymize it further…

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