Oy Vey! Not Again!

Last night as D and I were taking our walk, we came across a house we pass all the time. There are always people out there, mostly men, and they always say hi. This time, a woman was there with them who we had never seen before, and she yelled to us, “Are you mother and daughter?” To which I replied, “No!” and D said “Not at all!” And we kept walking. I cannot tell you how many times we have been asked this question or one similar, like are you sisters? This gets D’s blood boiling on many levels, but mainly because they all assume she’s my mother. This totally blows my mind when it happens because, yes, we have an age difference, but it’s only 6 years! D looks very young for her age, but I think the problem is that I look very young too. I have tried to tell her that that’s the reason, and not because she looks really old-but she doesn’t buy it. It really hurts her feelings. (I wish she would let me post a picture on here so you can see what I mean, but she’s very private and would KILL me if I did that!) I have been mistaken for a student countless times, and people don’t believe me when I tell them I am 34. I think it’s kind of funny that people are so curious about us, but D doesn’t. She said that she wanted to say to the lady “No, but why do you people ask such personal questions of strangers?”

You might be curious as to why we didn’t correct this woman. Well, let’s just say she didn’t look like the type of person who would be open to us. D and I talked about it on the rest of the walk and I wondered aloud why we didn’t react differently. It was a surprise, first of all, and second, I think when that happens we really have to weigh the outcome of such a confession.Will she react badly? Does she live here and will we have to see her all the time? It’s a small town, and we have never had any problems, and don’t want to start!

D said that we live in the “dumbest town” because no one gets us. I guess it’s good that they don’t automatically jump to “lesbian lovers”, but mother/daughter?! Really?! C’mon people!

So, by the time we got home we had come up with a plan. We’re going to get teeshirts made up!

On the front we are going to have an arrow and “She’s my wife.” And on the back, “Yeah, you read that right!”

Or, the same for the front and then the back will say different things. Like mine would say, “No she’s not my mother – I am 34.” And D’s would say: “Yes, she is over 18 and I am not old enough to be her mom.” (or other such statistics)

What do you think? Would that solve the problem? 😉

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About thelesbiannextdoor

I am a 40 year old lesbian, living with her wife in a small town. I have a 22 year old step-son. Who knows, I could be your neighbor ;) (Unless you know for sure your neighbor is not a lesbian - then I'm probably not!)

Posted on September 22, 2011, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. 6 Comments.

  1. I don’t know if it would help, but it would sure be funny!

  2. “I have been mistaken for a student countless times, and people don’t believe me when I tell them I am 34.”

    Change that to 32, and that’s me, too. Sometimes an advantage, oftentimes not so much.

  3. i’m with D. it’s offensive to me that strangers would be asking such personal questions. we got it (sisters although we’re obviously not from the same part of the planet) in the hospital and that was annoying enough.

    but i do think our heteronormative culture is slowly changing, for what it’s worth. such personal questions. we got it (sisters although we’re obviously not from the same part of the planet) in the hospital and that was annoying enough.

    but i do think our heteronormative culture is slowly changing, for what it’s worth.

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